When we experience toxic relationships, whether it is family, friends or an emotionally abusive partner, the toxic nature of emotional abuse causes us to create limiting beliefs about relationships…and the world that we live in.
If there has been a smear campaign waged against us, as a casualty, staggering into the daylight again we feel crushed by the experience and often the whole world feels like a dangerous place.
Some of these negative beliefs might be:
- Love isn’t safe
- Relationships are dangerous
- People aren’t safe
- People are untrustworthy
- I can’t trust or depend on people
- It’s my fault. I’m unlovable
- The world is a dangerous place
- I’ve done something unforgivable
- I’m bad
- I will always be alone
- My love it toxic and damages others
- I have to always do the right thing
- I must take care of others first
If we are holding onto these beliefs (even unconsciously) they can be a very heavy and limiting way to live. They stop us from connecting with people….when we need it the most.
EFT Tapping to release fear
This is where EFT Tapping can really help us in toxic relationships. Emotional Freedom Techniques are a powerful way to help us unravel these negative thoughts. For a reminder about EFT and the tapping points check out this video or download my FREE Manual
When we tap we create a ‘set up phrase’ this helps us tune into the issue we want to work on. If you feel that relationships are dangerous you might create a set up phrase such as:
“Even though toxic relationships are dangerous, I am safe and secure in this moment”
“Even though toxic relationships are dangerous, I acknowledge this belief and know that I am safe anyway”
“Even though toxic relationships are dangerous, I trust myself to make safe choices in the future”
When we use these phrases in the EFT Tapping sequence we create a ‘holding space’ for the negative belief but also balance it with a positive statement. Doing these two things together helps us to create a new relationship to the belief and give your mind/body system an opportunity to process the past and also embrace change.
The legacy of emotional abuse is often deep fear and desolation, this is understandable! To experience how EFT can help you check out this video tapping for desolation and try EFT for yourself. It is one of the safest self-care tools available to us….and its always at your fingertips.
If you would like to take a deeper dive into EFT techniques, join me on 19th October for the next L1&L2 Training. This 8-week online course is open to anyone hoping to learn more about EFT Tapping techniques.
EFT is often the first step towards true healing…..and freedom from the past.
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Kate Munden
Kate is a trauma and embodiment specialist. She is a TRE & EFT Supervising Mentor and is on the Executive Board of EFT International (formerly AAMET) and is a Comprehensive Energy Psychology Practitioner, DipPsych, Master Hypnotist, Master Practitioner of NLP and Time Line Therapy (accredited by the ABNLP) and has been an intuitive body & energy worker for 30 years. While she works with any problem state she specialises in the sensitive areas of Post Traumatic Stress, emotional abuse, chronic pain and anxiety.
